One of the biggest struggles in life, especially in young adulthood, is separating the people who matter from the people don’t have to matter. Initially, everyone you meet has the best of intentions and usually its further down the track when a friendship forms, that the cracks in people reveal. These cracks are the flaws that make who they are them, the flaws that everybody has.
I have come to an understanding that what separates the good crowd from the bad crowd is that it’s not what flaws they have but how they deal with them. I’ve had the best of both worlds- people who have known me since I was 13 know this, even people who have known me since last year know this. A ‘total bitch’ is an understatement. I still have my moments where I’ll say something offensive and insensitive without thought. Where ill act on impulse and %100 do something reckless I know I will regret later on. I’m not alone, my friends and I gather for pity parties sometimes. It happens.
Fortunately, through the years my friends and I have disciplined ourselves to be better people. We know our flaws will always be there but we don’t let it dictate our lives. This transition has taught me the valuable traits of being empathetic and patient. The empathy to understand why people are the way they are and the patience to stick around when they become complicated. It’s important that I emphasise this because the people I hold closest to my heart today have all fell victim to the worse side of me and know the full extent of its capability. To this day, I can never thank them enough for having the persistence and patience to stick around.
The point is, there may be people in your life right now who are holding you back and dragging you down. If there is even the tiniest bit of hope that you have left for them, don’t give them up just yet. In saying this, don’t be a door mat. Know when enough is enough.
But if one day they come round- answer the door, welcome them in, give them a great big hug and be relieved that they made it.